April Cerise, In Memoriam
sayin goodbye
August 2013
working for the man
should've never been
in our plan
but it's the cards life dealt us.

we were meant for
a grander scheme of things,
broader horizons to spread our wings,
the ability to defy gravity.

i'm sorry to say it wasn't.

waving goodbye as you left
how was i to know
how was i to know it could be
last time i'd see you on my native soil?

your old stomping grounds,
my old stomping grounds;
and just at my feet where i stood,
the resting place of relatives
from your side i'd passed
countless times but never knew
was there until then.

it's bizarre life's circumstances
we don't choose but live;
it's funny how saying goodbye
is more awkward than saying hello.

though you weren't really there
until i reached adulthood,
i read every single word you'd send me.
the letters, the cards that would come
secretly addressed to another relative.
i had learned well before then
it was perfectly fine to hide things.

look at where the wind blew me;
it definitely wasn't flight,
because that is by choice.

on the other side, maybe?
no one here gets out alive.

you always said that was
one of your favorite books.

no, no one does.
but maybe it truly, finally means freedom.

freedom from the man,
the pre-existing plan,
and all the plights
that prevent flight.

when a door closes,
a window opens.
i'll sleep with mine
cracked tonight.


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